C39 Thirty nine

"I closed my eyes and tried to calm myself. I leaned my lips against the window of the car. I could still hear the consecutive sighs of my companion, but I didn't look at him anymore.

I felt embarrassed for suddenly calling him and asking him to pick me up. I know he's busy too, just like my sister, who's also conscious about grades and focused on studying, which is probably why they stayed longer.

"Are you sure you want to go back to your sister's place? It's hard to adjust if you're transferring schools," he said coldly.

I opened my eyes and tiredly looked at him.

I shrugged. "I don't know," I answered, avoiding his gaze.

He glanced at me briefly before returning his gaze to the road.

"Yor, you can't just leave abruptly," he said.

I bit my lip and focused on the road.

He sighed. "Just because you're facing a problem doesn't mean you can just run away because you want to. Sometimes you need to face it," he insisted.

"I want to leave," I said firmly.

He nodded. "Care to explain?" he asked.

There was still traffic, so he turned to me again. I tried to avoid his gaze because he might report me to my sister or maybe even to Mom and Dad, that I'm feeling like this.

"We broke up," my voice hinted at tears.

That was enough reason for him to close his mouth and avoid eye contact. I lifted my gaze to him, and he barely glanced back before turning his gaze away.

I know how protective he was. Maybe it's because he knew how hurt I was right now?

"I'm afraid I might bump into them, Akia or what," I explained.

The car started moving again.

"I'm scared because I might just cry in front of them," I almost whimpered.

He sighed again and closed his mouth to stop any words from coming out.

I rubbed my temples and looked at him. "I don't know what to do," I explained.

We remained silent throughout the journey, and neither of us attempted to speak. It seems like he understands what I want. That I just want to rest my mouth. He quietly got out of the car and turned around to open the door for me.

I bit my lip hard and bowed my head as tears threatened to fall again. I didn't take my bag because I'll be coming back here anyway, so I got out.

I could still feel Samuel's gaze, but I didn't pay him any more attention and walked away with my head down. Here comes the impending sobbing and tightness in my chest again.

Why is it like this? Why does it seem so hard? Why does everything hurt so much? Can't he just be beside me and not with someone else?

"Baby.." I immediately looked up. Cyrus's lips trembled as he spoke.

I looked at him, furrowing my brows to prevent the tears from falling. His pleading eyes and flushed face only tightened the knot in my chest even more.

What does he want now? He wants me to end our relationship and I already did! Then why is he here?

"W-what are you doing here?" I almost broke into a whisper.

He took a step closer. "Baby.." I quickly stepped back.

He bowed his head, biting his lip, and gently ran his fingers through his hair before taking a deep breath and facing me.

I immediately looked away from his intense gaze. Because if I didn't, I might just turn to ashes.

I released a series of heavy breaths again. My knees started to weaken as his pleading voice and flushed face hinted at tears that could fall from his eyes at any moment.

I squeezed my senses and looked away. "I don't know what to do," I explained.

He nodded, following my lead, but it seemed like my heart was betraying me with its rapid beating.

"This isn't right! We're done! It's over! Enough," I thought to myself.

"We already broke up, Cyrus," I reminded him.

He chuckled. "I didn't agree... I won't agree," he said tenderly.

My hair stood on end when I felt him slightly smell my neck.

"Baby... You always smell good. I think your scent is one of my favorites," he said affectionately, making me slightly turn away.

"What's your perfume?" he asked, changing the subject.

I gently moved his trembling hand away from me. I faced him with courage, but it seems like my heart is being traitorous with its quick beating again.

This can't be! We've ended it! It's over! That's enough.

"We already broke up, Cyrus," I reminded him.

He shook his head and held both sides of my face. "Maybe at first I intended to end it... but Baby, I can't especially when you said that I can't go back to you. I can't," he said, his eyes fixed on mine.

I pursed my lips and slightly turned away to start walking.

"Baby, please don't leave me. Please, Selene, please baby," he pleaded.

I felt him following, but I was determined. Even if I want to stay, there's still a part of me that doesn't want to.

"I'll tell you the reason, Baby. Just don't leave and don't abandon me,"

I shook my head as I glanced at my open suitcase. I quickly walked towards the cabinet to get my clothes.

"No! Fuck it! Stop," he said, crying, trying to stop me.

My hands trembled as I reached for the hanging clothes. Some still looked freshly hung because they were not properly placed.

I walked towards my suitcase, and with every step, it felt like something sharp was piercing my chest, making the pain more intense with every step.

I put some of my clothes inside. "What's wrong with you?!" I shouted irritably at Cyrus.

As soon as I put clothes in the suitcase, he immediately took them out.

He looked at me, shaking his head. "N-no, Don't go," he said hoarsely.

I pressed my forehead and avoided his gaze. With every outfit I put in the suitcase, he immediately took them out.

He looked at me and trembled while his eyes teared up.