C1 Alora

You know those stories about unwanted rejects, whose loved ones either died or all abandoned them to drift aimlessly through the world? A worthless no one almost invisible to other people. Nothing spectacular about them ,no grand rise from nothing to something as they dawn into adulthood.

Yeah well, that is kind of my story.

My name is Alora Dennison and I am literally hours away from my awakening ceremony at the ripe old age of 18 years old, with absolutely no one who gives a crap about me to be there. I'm a late bloomer, I guess. Not that it is unusual in our bloodline, as almost every female in my family didn't 'come out' until they hit their late teens. Much like the others in the orphanage. Another reason we are snubbed and left to our own devices in this hell hole they call a home.

My ceremony has me all churned up inside and restlessly pacing the room I share with Vanka. She's like me, although in all the years we have bunked together I can't say we have ever become friends. She makes it clear she doesn't like me and much like everyone around me, they all keep their distance.

I'm an orphaned no-one whose parents died in the war of ten years ago against the vampires. So is she, but it didn't warm her to me in anyway. I guess because she is from the Santo pack and they have hated the Whyte pack since long before the war. We were feuding before the vampires united every one of us.

We were just two small girls left with no guardians put in this place for unwanted cubs, to live out our days in unexceptional ways. It would have been kinder to end our misery back then, than leave us to live as outcasts among our own people. Shunned because we are the shameful proof that their own packs failed them. I don't think they knew what else to do with us. So many young with no one left and seen as cursed. They were ashamed of the failings of our families and we are the ones to carry that burden.

I am amazed that kids like us even get to go through with the ceremony, I mean it's kind of a big deal and we are kind of not. We are a bit like the lost boys in Wonderland, except.... none of us want to stay here and growing up is the only way out.

Your awakening is a bit like graduation in a sense. A passing from child to adult and normally where you would find your place in the pack - get a mate. I have no delusions that it means anything of the sort for any of us turning tonight. Of which there are four from the home of unwanted, and I hear maybe three from the packs around. Just a handful of kids trying to break free, find their place, and all in the great presence of the entire 'packdom'.

The packdom being the dozen or so wolf packs from the state.

They all have to convene on the shadow rock to watch you transform fully for the first time under the first full moon of your birth month. It's not hard to figure out when you are ready. The weeks running up to your birthday, you start to change in small ways and god damn it hurts. Like having your insides snapped and stretched in fits of severe twisting pain.

The signs are pretty evident to all. Kind of like puberty for werewolves, I guess. Maturing, physical improvements and a massive rise in appetite and aggression. Little moments where you start to transform painfully and then it dissipates just as quickly so you never really reach a first transform. That pain is saved for the full moon after your birthday.

Some don't go through it until later in life and some earlier. Usually when you turn, is a sign of where you stand in the hierarchy. The longer it takes, the weaker your DNA. So, 18, puts me way down on the pecking order and just confirms my bloodline were not that of warriors. Vanka is 16 and she too is turning tonight.

I mean look at the Santo's, they are the reigning pack in the state and everyone in their bloodline turned before the age of ten. Colton is 19 years old, lords over all in our kingdom and he has been running with the pack since he was a mere eight years old. Every single one of his family returned from the wars, which speaks volumes to the purity of their genes. He's destined to take over from his father as Alpha one day and the way things are heading, he won't just be alpha of the Santo pack, but all of us. Something that has never happened in our lifetime.

Santo is not a nice guy. He walks around surrounded by his crew, looks down at the likes of us and never makes eye contact or responds to anyone below his station. That is how it works here - dominance and strength is everything.

He has his father's arrogance and he knows every female hitting puberty is craving to become his mate. Faultlessly good looking in that Latino, pretty boy kind of way. I think the one time he actually acknowledged my existence was the day he pushed me out of his way in passing. I had tripped in front of him in the corridor to the great hall, and he didn't bat an eye or miss a step in shoving me back aggressively like I was a lightweight piece of trash. All the girls laughed at me when I landed on my ass and skidded back into the trashcan.

I have made sure to never get in his way again.

Not that we had much time in the same place. I live in the orphanage and go to the school nearby that was built purely for our kind, away from normal people. He was ahead of me by one year so we didn't really cross paths in all those years, and he lives with his pack on the south side of the mountain , only coming to the shadowy north when required. Our people all moved and convened nearer the mountain from all surrounding areas after the great war. Keeping close to stay protected and no one ever left again. His father is the unofficial Dominant Alpha and likes to check in with all on the mountain when he sees fit. Since Colton graduated school, we only see him when by his father's side for official visits.

Rumour has it the vampires have been brewing and gathering for some months, maybe even years to regain numbers and launch a new war on our kind. We always knew they would. I mean we won the war but we didn't defeat them in the way we wanted. Many survived and fled and have been out there for almost ten years recovering from it. It's been quiet for so long but there is so much unease and unrest that the packs called together a meeting a month back to decide the fate of our future. Trouble stirring and we could all feel it. They think a coming together to create one pack and one unity is the answer to a brewing war. Not that it changes much as we have been living almost that way for a decade.

We were never united before under just one Alpha though. We fought as separate packs and it almost wiped us out. There was no leadership as a whole and it meant packs like mine, known for peaceful living and farming, were almost annihilated. Many of our kin never returned and those who did, were forever changed. Those like me who lost everyone - parents, grandparents, uncles and my brother...we are shunned by people who like to pretend it never happened. My family were weak, none of them came back and therefore in the eyes of the pack...my bloodline is weak. They didn't want to claim us as their pack anymore.

Warriors came home. The weak did not.

We were never ready for it. They were farmers, they were peaceful and had never had to fight in their lives. In a whirlwind of months, everyone was dragged into a battle to the death and children were left in the care of the old. We waited weeks to find out who of our loved ones would come home.

I still remember the agony of the day I watched others return and no one, not a single person from my family came back. There is no pain compared to that of an eight-year-old child learning everyone she ever loved and was protected by, were never coming home. My security was shattered and my future dead.

So now here we are, a house full of teens who bare the only living connection to our past loved ones. A mixed bunch of leftovers, but no one in the packs will bond to us for fear of producing weaker offspring. It's all about dominance in our world.

They call us the reject pack.

We don't belong to anyone anymore, even though by rights we should be part of the packs we always were bonded too. They see us as cursed children and deny our existence. This house is the only home we know and the people who care for us do so in duty, but not love. They are afraid we curse them by proximity.

It's forbidden to abandon a pack child even if they come from a shamed bloodline. So, we are given a home, shelter, food and education. Basic care in the understanding that upon our awakening, we get to leave. We can go out find our own path and fend for ourselves. Find a pack who want us if that is even possible. Solves their problem and shirks off any responsibility they have for us. Which sucks if you happen to turn at a young age.

So that's where I am now. Just a mere four hours before we have to climb to shadow rock for the full moon and I will transform for the first time of my life. I will change from child to woman and my gifts will manifest. Not that I have any clue what those will be, if any at all. Not all of us have a special gift and it's unlikely I will.

I have watched this ceremony once a month for many years and it still terrifies me to know I will be one of them. With a first transform comes pain, a lot of it. You hear the cracking of bones, the tearing of flesh and the howling of those going through it. It's inevitable. It's awful to see but they tell us it only hurts that way the first time. After we will be physically different and the pain will be far less clawing.

I have seen it. Physical improvement they call it. It's the leaving of childlike features behind, firming up, muscling over. All who have turned become superior in every way. Not that I want to change. I am already tall, slim, athletic and I wouldn't say I was ugly. I'm on the pretty side of plain, with full lips, mousy brown hair and abnormally green eyes. I guess I am what one would call girl next door, but it's just another flaw in my genetic makeup. The alphas are all handsome or beautiful and physically perfect. You can't deny good genes when it's shown in every single little way.

Now I wait. Shower, dress, brush my hair and pace like a maniac as I watch the clock and count down the minutes.

This could be the first step in changing everything. I can leave after tonight; I can walk away from this mountain and the people who treat us like we are nothing.

I'll be free to run far away, with no bond to anyone or anything. I just need to get through it first and then it's the start of a new life for me.