C8 Chapter 7: Heart to Heart Talk (Part 3)

Jin opens his mouth wide, seals his lips, and chews the bulgogi inside his mouth in peace. The excess sauce made his lips moist as its tender texture made his heart smile in glee. He took his time to savor its rich flavor as the fine beef melted in his mouth.

He ate merrily without getting interrupted, his thoughts and eyes focused on his plate alone. No words escaped his lips until he finished the meal with one last gulp. Slowly, he later then lowers his hand to the table and drops his chopsticks on his now empty plate before drinking his lemon water.

He felt stuffed whilst his hand draped over his lower abdomen. He heard the slight growl from his stomach like it was thanking him for feeding it after hours of continuous neglect.

Eating his meals kept gradually slipping out his head often nowadays. However, the delicious meal consoled his heavy heart, erased the lifeless glint in his eyes, and lifted his mood.

His mother was at the counter table with him whilst sitting across from his seat. She was busy with the paperwork she brought home from the office. With her eyes glued to the large screen of the tablet that's facing her, supported with a metal stand beside her tea, she would check on him from time to time while continuously doing her work.

“Mom," Jin calls. He has plenty of questions to ask her. Likewise, she promised him they would talk it out.

He would not want to wait until tomorrow comes like usual.

Asami’s fingers halt from tapping on the screen on her tab. "Hmm?" she hums, pressing the button 'sent' on the upper left corner of the displayed screen before she tidies her stuff on the counter. She'll get back on this later.

"You’re not in a fight with the Yens are you?”

She lifts her chin and looks back at her curious child. His eyebrows were perfectly furrowed.

He looked like an angry version of Mochi. How adorable.

While having wholesome thoughts, she shook her head, turned her tablet off, and gave the angry mitten in front of her a small smile.

“No, sweetheart. The Yens and I are good.” More than you could imagine. “I’m sorry if we couldn’t dine with them.”

Well, she’s glad it was agreed from both sides that the dinner date with the Yens will be moved tomorrow.

Upon reading the situation, Asami thought it’s best to tell him now than never.

But she should start slow.

She leans in, her elbows pressed onto the table as her hand reaches out to his.

“Jin, what do you think of your father?”

Her other arm went up to her opposite shoulder, her fingers touching and rubbing the skin under her collarbone beneath her beige semi-duster dress, causing her sleeves to move slightly.

She was a little anxious about his reply. Somehow, she felt his response to her hadn't changed throughout the years.

Jin’s pupils twitch. He looks down at his dainty fingers on the table. His birth father?

Are they having this conversation again?

Jin swiftly pulls his arms away from the table and places his hands on his lap. He smiles at his mother, yet he's clenching his fist tightly on top of his tensed thighs.

He kept his rising anger invisible within his mother’s sight.

“I don’t have much to say about him.”

‘An irresponsible asshole.’

He wishes to say that out loud to her, but he refrains from doing so. No matter how rational and understandable is his anger was towards his father, he does not want to hurt her.

After all, his father was the man her mother once loved and cherished, but that past affection buried in history couldn't change the fact of how horrible he is as a parent and a husband.

At the age of five, merely healthy enough to lift a finger in his hospital bed after being admitted for two months, Jin was severely ill and his severe depression over his father's sudden absence affected his body more.

In those months, he waited and convinced himself his father would return to them and they would eat ice cream after getting discharged from the hospital because his father promised him that. He promised they would travel the world when his body recovers and gets stronger.

Reminiscing the memory he had back then, slowly, it began to fade away detail by detail.

He wants to forget, he was a fool to believe in his father's words. Naive and clueless, he was told at an early age of five and forced to accept that his father left them.

The image of a happy family they once were was suddenly torn apart inside his head.

All these years, he had wondered what reason he has in his hands to abandon them so easily.

Jin’s disgusted with how much of a coward his father was to leave them both alone for twelve years without showing any signs of life or giving his mother financial support.

In his earlier years, his health was at its very worst. Their hospital bills were lining up which caused his mother to go through hardships such as begging for money in that crucial time of situation to their relatives for his operation.

His mother used to go to work every day without rest and when night came, she would stay up all night to monitor him.

There wasn't a day where she didn't worry over him or get an adequate amount of sleep.

Jin could never forgive that man for leaving everything behind to his mother. His father will be the last person he would think and care about if ever the world were to end.

If his father chooses to reappear again in their life, he would not bat a lash or be swayed and moved upon hearing his excuses. What makes him think he has the rights? He was not there with them when they were on the verge of losing hope.

He never was.

He was not with him when he and his mother needed him.

Jin could never bring himself to forgive such a cruel person.

His father, wherever he may be right now, dead or alive, he does not care. That man should never come across the idea that they needed someone to rely on inside his head.

They are now moving forward and doing fine on their own. His mother is livelier than before, so they don’t need him.

Asami’s chest tightens as she watches his irk expression alongside anger inside his eyes. She refrains her tears to flow, but because someone has been there picking up the pieces of her broken soul and putting them back together one after another, the immense pain she felt was now long gone.

All she had left was pity and remorse.

Oh, Beom-seok, are you hearing this?

She knew better of what happened. Genuinely, his past husband does not deserve his son’s resentment.

“I know it’s been tough for you, but I’m trying my best to support you in all ways and be a better parent you needed than yearning for two.”

Asami retrieves herself. Her fingers play with the mug in front of her that contains her favorite black tea. It was now cold, she bet it would taste bland to her tongue.

“Fighting with the Yens is not part of the situation right now.” She nibbles her lips but releases them afterward. All these years, she never felt so free. She now had the freedom from being trapped inside a void full of painful memories. She broke free from the chains draped over her that locked her agony and pain inside her.

When she came out, it was the very first time she opened herself to someone, and that person accepted her injured and damaged soul.

She had battled the fear that prevented her from moving forward as she was afraid stepping forward would pull her back ten steps behind, but she didn't go through it alone, they fought that fear together.

That person’s warm hands personally bandaged her and treated her like she was as fragile as a flower that just bloomed in the wrong season. That person made her feel as loved as she was twenty years ago.

“I have already settled some plans for us this dinner.”

Jin stared at his mother in silence, brainstorming what date was today.

Is today a holiday?

What could be the special occasion? On the other hand, he was relieved that it was not a fight with the Yens that caused the dinner from two families to not take place.

Asami rises from her seat to move towards the empty seat beside Jin. Her hands reach out to his open palms. She held it with care and squeezed it slightly, “There’s someone who’s been looking forward to meeting you. He’d be ecstatic if he were to meet you this said dinner.”

Like a person who fell from heaven to earth, Jin felt his soul leave his body as he pauses, even his breathing came to cease. Someone? His stomach drops.

It's not what he thinks it is, does it?

"Is it your past your husband?" He dare not say the word 'father', the man doesn't deserve it.

His ears and eyes focused on the movements of her lips.

"No," whispers his mother.

He has yet to process what his mother said, but then the following words of his mother fired made him completely frozen in his seat.

“Jin.” Asami wants him to meet the person who gave her sunlight during her rainy days and watch her bloom again, the person who voluntarily stepped into her dark realm and pulled her out there himself.

“What do you think of having a new Dad?”

The corner of Asami’s lips lift, her warmest smile ever since Jin can remember, but within that moment, everything around him was a blur.

"What do you think of me remarrying?"

Jin felt like he received another blow as he blinked his eyes once, then twice as his lips part open.

What?