C11 Chapter 11

My heart was filled with joy as I stepped foot in the city.

However, I can't deny the fear that was creeping through me. I felt like throwing up in nervousness, even my body shook a bit just by the thought of going back.

Having myself here was completely a big risk. Yet I don't want to hide in the dark anymore. Isolating myself merely because of fear of judgment. I realized seven years of hiding was enough.

Although I didn't hide like everyone thought I was. I certainly wanted peace.

Away from the issues which my name was involved in, avoiding the public, and prioritizing my mental health were the main reasons I ran.

Well, aside from my parents.

"I already sent someone to fetch you there, Aya. I will see you tonight," said Lexin on the other line.

I stopped walking for a bit. I was biting my lower lip behind the black mask I'm wearing, even had the urge to take my cap, and pulled my hair in frustration upon hearing her.

"Okay, then?" My voice was full of sarcasm "I thought you wanted to see me, Lex. What happened to your free schedule today?"

I admit I'm feeling annoyed. I clearly understand how tight her schedule is but the fact that she made a promise to me.

Before I fled away from the province, she promised...

"Something came up..." She heaved a deep sigh. "Please understand, Aya. As you've said before, I have a big name which follows a major responsibility. I'm not the Lexin you encountered in Summerville, love..."

"Alright, okay. I understand. Tell your driver to leave me alone."

"Amaia..." It was a warning. "Ride the damn car and wait for me in the house. Alex will arrive soon from school."

"Fuck you, Lex."

I dropped the call and annoyingly pulled the earphones, letting them hang on the neckline of my shirt.

Part of me was angry at myself for being weak, believing her words, and making me sway in joy.

She was partly the reason why I convinced myself to be here despite my fear. Yet, ugh. How can she make my heart dance in delight then, break it just like that?!

I felt ashamed of myself. That was a moment of weakness. Also that night... I should have disagreed with her.

Huh! What does she think of me? That I would just let her boss me around like a dang puppet? I should end this not-so-serious tie with her if this continues!

Eventually, I escaped and rode an uber on the way to Sid's house. As usual, we lived in the same neighborhood and were really expecting to see each other soon.

Good thing he was there when I arrived!

"Oh my gosh, Aya. You did really let her do that to you?! You're not my friend if that's the case! You just met her yet you already let your guard down!" He was feeling stressed for me.

I pursed my lips. I want to cry in embarrassment for myself.

"I..." My lips quivered. "I didn't know what I was doing, Sid. I was carried away! I was so overwhelmed that night that I wasn't able to voice out my opinion. The contentment I felt that time was beyond, Sid. To the point that I let her have me just like that."

A tear left my eye. This was not a joke anymore.

I made a promise not to let any woman break me again as I don't want to repeat the same mistake before.

The past caused me nothing but fear and pain. And now...

Some may think that it's too shallow. She's busy and that I must understand her but that's clearly not my point.

It was the feeling I felt when she broke her words. The pain and the feeling of betrayal...

I don't know what to do. It's not like we've built a strong bond but with Lexin, it's just felt different.

I was hurt before her... The least thing I wanted was to get through the same thing again.

"No more trauma, Aya... I've seen you at your lowest point and I don't ever want to see it again! A woman was your greatest downfall, and I can see that you haven't learned your lesson yet."

I covered my face with my palms. "Am I being too shallow?" I whispered.

"You're not, girl..." Sid sat on his knees then, pulled my hand away from my face. "You've been hurt before, Aya. You're just trying to save yourself from drowning again. I understand your pain, alright?"

I stared at him wearily. "What should I do?" I'm sure he could sense the desperate tone in my voice.

"You already took a big risk coming here, showing yourself with confidence. Why don't we try to go out tonight, hmm? I'll inform our friends here."

"You're not being serious here." I stood up, putting my hand on my waist, while I massaged my temple as I walked back and forth.

Think, Amaia. I like Lexin, a lot. I'm feeling bad as it was just one mistake of hers yet, I'm thinking of leaving.

We haven't even started anything yet... But by the looks of it, I figured our relationship won't last nor work.

"Or just call her and break up."

"Shall I do that?" I stopped moving. "I mean, do I even need to do that? We just happened like forty-two hours ago?"

"For closure?" He, too, was unsure. He sat on the long sofa and crossed his legs.

Shaking my head, I began to walk again. "I think I'm being too emotional, don't you think?"

I heard him grimace. "Seriously... You're changing your mood faster than a pregnant woman, Aya."

"I was just hurt, Sid..." I sighed and stopped. "You know how I value promises. Words are words... Once you promise, you should fulfill it."

He shrugged. "But she didn't."

"She was busy!" I defended her. "She's Lexin Santos after all."

In the end, I didn't call nor texted her. After a small talk with Sid, I went straight to my block where I was welcomed by furniture covered with a white cloth.

I spent my whole day cleaning the two-story house. Even if I wanted to rest after the general cleaning, my body seems to not like the idea. Instead of sleeping, I scrolled through online shops and bought the things I needed in my house.

After getting rid of everything, I fell asleep only to be disturbed by a familiar voice.

No... It's not just Sid who was shouting and banging my door but with friends, too.

"Aya! Wakey, wakey! Party's waiting for you!" I heard a woman's voice followed by laughter.

I groaned as I got up. That was when I noticed that I slept on the long sofa.

"Amaia Cruiz!"

My eyes widened in shock not because of how deep the voice was but for the reason that it was too loud! It even creates an echo effect! What the actual fuck?

They were using a damn microphone!

"What the hell, Sid!" I shouted at the top of my lungs.

Walking towards the door, I opened the hatch feeling annoyed.

"I was trying to—" I almost jumped in surprise when confetti popped right in front of me!

"Welcome back, Aya!"

Everyone ran towards me and threw themselves at my small body that we ended up stumbling on the floor!

"Ahh! Damn you! You all are too heavy!" I cried.

"Yay! Let's party! We have reserved a VIP room in the high-end bar in the city!"

"We heard you're broken," one of them said.

As if on cue, my eyes went to Sid who acted innocent by looking at the corners, avoiding my gaze. They all stood up after salvaging me while I kept on sending glares in Sid's direction.

"Who told you?" I accepted the hand that was held out to help me stand up.

"Who else? Of course, the gossiper in the circle." Elijah pointed out. She lazily sat on the single sofa.

"Oh my god..." I whispered to myself. "I'm not up for a party!"

But that was a big lie. An hour later, I just found myself drinking with the five of them in the VIP room in the high-end hotel bar.

"I heard he's happily married to his long-time girlfriend! Even posted their engagement rings on Instagram with a long ass caption!" It was Elijah, smirking and obviously drunk.

"Oh, please... No crying, Eli. I thought you moved on?"

My upper lip rose up. Ah, friends... Was it the reason why we're destroying our liver?

"Excuse me, I'll just go to the bathroom..." I excused myself.

I was kinda feeling hot and dizzy. Must be the drinks. Good thing there was a good samaritan who led me to the bathroom without taking advantage.

I uttered thanks before I went inside, directly to the sink, and opened the faucet to wash my mouth.

Closing my eyes, I rested my hands on the counter to support myself. I heard the door opened but didn't bother to look at who.

"So, you chose to party rather than answer my calls."

I froze. Slowly, I opened my eyes and through the mirror, I met her pair of cold eyes.

"Lexin..."