C3

Jeremy walked side by side with his youngest daughter. She’d taken his character, carefree .. always smiling. He still couldn’t believe they’d found her after seven years!seven long years.“Can you call me dad, pretty please…I wanna just uh, hear you say it” he asked and she laughed. She laughed so easily too.“dad” she said and he smiled, but the smile was shortlived as he saw a frown settle on her face.“is anything wrong?” at first she shook her head then she sighed.“that obvious?... Tasha and I aren’t really snuggle buddies, and I honestly get why..after seven years, I come over and invade her space, her organized life and all these stupid coincidental occurrences…” “she should’ve told her friends that her twin was back”“she should’ve…I don’t know, I just feel it’s my fault”“so because of that you plan to impersonate your sister for the time you’ll be here?.. that’s it?”“you’re not exactly helping” Mikael groaned. The silence that followed was almost palpable. The wind blew their hair in different directions.“you remember when you were little you couldn’t get enough of one movie”“…mulan” she said, a smile playing on her lips”“Mulan wasn’t much of Barbie girl now was she? But just to make her father proud, she went to see the match maker”“yeah, and she made a complete fool of herself, the matchmaker hated her… where are you going with this?”“lesson 1. Whatever you do in good will come with its consequences, so why not do what you enjoy?” he let that sink in then he added“later on, she got into the army by pretending she was a boy, that worked out pretty well until…”“until they found out she wasn’t”“lesson two, lying won’t take you far”“but I’m not…”“pretense is as good as lying darling..the truth is bound to come out sooner or later, so what’s the use of trying to push it away”“so you’re saying..”“you should get the hell out of Tasha’s shadow.. time’s ticking”

************

“So how was your dance practice?”

Liv asked endearingly, breaking me out of my reverie. “it was cool, we danced” I said and her eyes widened.

“you danced? Like..as in together?"

“yeah”

“as you or..”

“as Tasha”

“Ba..be!” she drawled groaning which made me giggle.

“I know..I know”

“you can’t keep being..”

“and I don’t plan too..not for long anyway. I’m just waiting for a..a sign” I said and she stayed silent for a while.

“hope you didn’t get him angry” there was that anger stuff again. Why was she always implying that he’ll get angry, getting into trouble.

“no…but someone else did. He was so angry which was kind of scary then shortly after, he just dismissed us and walked away..didn’t turn back even when I called him, which was weird” I’d thought about running after him but couldn’t. The risks were too many. What if he figured out I wasn’t Tasha? What if Tasha came running out to meet him and I was there…

“he has a very short fuse, gets angry for no reason"

“is that normal?” Liv shrugged

“probably, but most times when he does stuff like that, Tasha gets very angry or so I’ve heard..they aren’t exactly Ken and Barbie” They shared a laugh.

“I can imagine” ______________

Off for my evening stroll, I wore a grey jumpsuit taking my phone with me, my earplugs and playing motivation . the wind was cool and the beats of the music awesome and without thinking, I began to vibe to the music, flow with the beat.

“you know you look crazy to those of us that aren’t hearing the song you’re dancing to right?” shocked, I paused the music and pulled out my earplugs.

“Damian! .. sorry didn’t notice you there” why were we always clashing? Why couldn’t Tasha hold her boyfriend? Speaking of Tasha, she’d been avoiding me lately..and I’m glad.

“I know, your music was pretty loud. Don’t take it the wrong way but you seem to be a better person in the evenings” he said and I laughed.

“I know believe me”

“and you don’t like me touching you in the evenings” he said and I managed a forced laugh

“well I respect that….problem is, I feel like kissing you more when you’re dressed like that”He paused to look me over.“when you dance like that.” He was leaning in, fingering my hair. Fuck should I let him kiss me? Just this once?

She turned away.

“fuck! Tasha, thought you said you’d forgiven me..what wrong did I do this time?”

“I’m..I’m sorry ” she said and turned jogging away. He stared after her, surprised and angry. His drug was wearing off.

She’s sorry? __________________

Damian walked into the house.. that was never his home. His mom had died some years back. Died in the hospital, right before his eyes. He practically saw her soul leave her. Remembered it like it happened the day before…His dad was running late, so he’d stayed with his mom holding her hand, saying to her anything that came to his mind. He’d felt her slowly decline, felt her fingers cold, felt her life force seep out of her. He’d whispered, he’d begged, cried and yelled at her, yelling that if she loved him she’d stay. But either she hadn’t listened or she hadn’t heard..

Because she didn’t come back.

His father had come in a few minutes after, trying to calm the twelve years old Damian. Damian was angry, his father was the one she’d wanted to see before she died, kept on asking for him. He was angry at his dad.. angry at his mom. How dare she leave after everything she promised? She’d lied to him! told him she’d get well, ride a bike with him..and she left without even saying goodbye Without knowing he was there. A few years later, his father remarried. Long story short, his step brother was white, step mom a racist.

She hated him.

But that’s okay cause the feeling was mutual. He became withdrawn and needed drugs to be stable.

“Damian, is that you?”

Speak of the devil.

“take out the trash will you?” the anger flared but he tried to tame it, not sure his dad will like the idea of coming home to see his wife on the ceiling fan. Just then Tony walked in.

Mother and son

“tell your son to do it..he’s home” he said smiling in delight as Tony backed away from his glare. Tony was actually a nice guy, before he became wary of Damian, he actually tried to form a mutual friendship. But Damian couldn’t like him, he had one fault.He was his mother’s son.And for that reason alone Damian hated him..used him as a punching bag whenever he was angry. He tried to control it sometimes, tried not to hit Tony, but sometimes it was inevitable

“you son of a bitch! Always so…”

“mom, mom…I’ll do it” Tony said hurriedly interrupting his mother.

“damn you” Damian said feeling the palpitations as he walked to his room. Rushing to where the drugs were.

Fluoxetine.

Sometimes, he abused them. But he had a monthly supply , two doses of 20mg per day. He popped the green and yellow pill into his mouth. Washing it down with water he felt his blood cool down, felt an unclear lucidity

…Damn.