C19 Chapter 18 - Valentina

What’s that even supposed to mean?

“Anyway, I’m pretty sure he hooked up with Allison. She posted a photo the day after that from his house in Palermo, and I could see his cat.”

Aleksi doesn’t seem interested in the discussion anymore, probably because he doesn’t want to hear his sister talking about some guy she’s having sex with.

“How long have you been sleeping with him?” I ask.

“Uh…since Halloween?”

“And how often?”

“Every weekend, almost. Whenever we’re in the same place we go to his place afterwards.”

I nod. “Well, from what I hear, he just likes sleeping around and having fun. I don’t think he’s got anything serious going on with Allison. Or anyone, for that matter.” I'm slightly hinting at the fact that she’s one of those people.

“I know.” She says with a hint of sadness in her voice. “But there’s just something about him that makes me want to go back.”

“Do you guys get along?”

“Yeah. He’s funny, and he’s smart. And very good in bed. I get tingles just thinking about it.”

“If he gives you tingles down there, then you’re definitely fucked.” I tell her, not even trying to make a joke.

“I know, right?” she exclaims, excited that I’m sharing this with her. “So when did you last have sex? Have you ever had anyone else except Jamie?”

I shake my head. “It was last year and no…I haven’t.”

“Jesus, Valentina. I would’ve bet you have at least five by now!”

I shrug. “I don’t know, I just-I don’t know. I want it to be…spontaneous, you know? Like I want it to be exciting and I want someone to impress me- I don’t know.”

“You’ve never had a one night stand?”

I shake my head.

“So you’ve only ever seen one?!”

“No, I’ve done…stuff with other guys, but I haven’t had sex sex.” I explain, looking around to see if Aleksi or Adrik are listening. They’re not, thank God.

“But if you had to choose one, who would you choose?”

“What? Out of who?”

“All the boys you know.” She says, smirking.

I think about Vinnie first, because I’ve always thought he’s cute and attractive, but I never really considered him as a real option because he also never seemed interested.

“I don’t know, maybe Vinnie?” I say.

“Oh my God! I thought you would’ve said Marco.”

“Adrik’s friend?” I ask.

“He’s friends with Adrik? He’s Matteo’s brother.”

“Yeah. I’ve known him for a long time. Why would you say Marco?”

I look in Adrik’s direction, but he looks like he’s already asleep.

“Because he’s obviously into you and you two seem cute.”

“When did you even see us?”

“This summer in Taormina, or at Matteo’s apartment. It’s so cute how he gets all fidgety around you.”

“I haven’t noticed.” I say, trying to remember the last time I talked to Marco and whether there were any cues. I don’t like Raisa putting things in my head because I know she likes to gossip and may make things up just so she could have something to talk about. “And I’m not interested in anyone anyway right now. I want to focus on myself for a while.”

“Valentina, it seems like you’ve been doing that your whole life.”

“That’s not fair. I was with Jamie for years.”

“Yes, and you spent all of your time with him and began ignoring your friends.” I frown. “Not on purpose though.”

“Yes, I know. But I’m just saying, it’s okay to have sex with someone else if you feel like it. Jamie isn’t the only guy on the planet who can fuck you good.”

“It’s not about that.”

“Then what is it about?”

“I know exactly who I could sleep with if I wanted to, but having options sometimes means none of them are special.”

Raisa looks at me bewildered. “What?”

“I don’t only care about how a guy looks, you know? I want to be impressed, surprised…I want it to be exciting.” I don’t elaborate further because I know it’s not the right person nor the right place. I just can’t be attracted to someone sexually if they don’t excite me in any other way.

“Matteo is pretty exciting.” She says, like she’s trying to sell me the idea of him.

“In what way?”

“He can do whatever he wants, whenever he wants. He asked me to go to the Bahamas one morning because he saw a video on Instagram and I couldn’t say yes because I knew I had a project due. He even offered to pay for everything, like he always does. Never even asks or hints at it.”

Okay, so money is clearly a factor here.

“We were out eating one evening and everybody knew him wherever we went. Even at the clubs he doesn’t own, people know him. He’s just so…charming.”

“Maybe you only like the idea of him.”

“I think I’ve gotten to know him really well over the past few months.”

“Do you text?”

“Yes, sometimes. And sometimes he takes days to reply. He’s sort of like you.” She jokes, even though it’s clear that it bothers her.

“Well, I don’t know what to tell you. Do you want advice?”

She cocks her head at me. “About what?”

I wave it off, smiling. “Nevermind.”

I take my phone out and text Isabella on WhatsApp.

Valentina: wyd

Isabella: omw to NY

Isabella: you

Valentina: same

Valentina: r u okay? What happened at nye?

Isabella: * eye roll emoji *

Isabella: I knew those bitches would talk

Isabella: * voice message *

I put my earphones in and press the voice message.

“We were at Vinnie’s house and Sophia got mad at him for flirting with Ariana so she called the police on him saying he had drugs. They arrived like, around midnight- I don’t even know, the party was busted after that. But I’m telling you Allison and Sophia planned the whole thing-”

“Stop talking shit!” Matteo’s voice is heard in the background.

“Fuck off, I heard them talking. Anyway. We’re on our way back to New York, the boys were let go twelve hours later and now everything’s normal.”

“Who are you talking to about thi-”

The audio cuts off.

Valentina: shit

Valentina: yeah I experienced some weird things too

Valentina: can’t record rn tho

Isabella: when do you land

Valentina: in 8hr

Isabella: omg same

Isabella: where do you land

Valentina: Anthonson

Isabella: ok I’ll talk to the pilot you can take our car

Valentina: I’m with Raisa and our brothers

Isabella: can’t you ride with me?

Valentina: I guess

Valentina: I need to tell her tho

After we usually land, there’s a six-person SUV waiting to take us on the one-hour trip to Hamilton College.

“Uhh…I think Isabella lands at the same time as us, and she asked me to go in her car on the way to college because she wants to talk to me about something.”

Raisa looks surprised but unimpressed.

“Is it about what happened at New Year’s?”

I shrug. “I don’t know. I think it might be boy trouble as well.” I lie.

“Oh really.” Raisa says, leaning forwards. “With who?”

“That’s what I mean, she wants to tell me in person.” I say, and it is obvious now that no matter what uninteresting thing I come up with, she'll want to know.

“Alright then.”

After a few moments of silence, she asks me whether Matteo is with her on the plane. “Vinnie posted a story from the plane.” She explains.

I look up from my phone, taking out my earphone as a sign that I want to be left alone.

“Maybe, I think so.” Then I put my earphone back in, consciously ignoring her throughout the flight. There’s something about her that I’ve never realized before: how much energy she drains from me when she starts talking about other people and their problems, without even seeing her own. I’ve got my own shit to deal with. Well, not really, but some peace and quiet would be nice.

***

We land around 9:30pm local time and get into our car. As we leave the landing strip, there are two SUVs just like ours blocking the exit.

“Who’s in the cars?” I hear Raisa ask herself as I open the door. She tries looking through our tinted window in order to see through their tinted window, which was more funny than anything, really. I grab my backpack and my shoulder bag before I jump out of our car.

I say goodbye to my brother and the Volkovs before I look straight at the two cars in front me. Isabella pops her head out through the roof of one of them, happily waving.

“Hiii.” I greet her as soon as I’m in the car and the door slides closed behind me. She hugs me and as I sit down, I notice Matteo on the seats across from us, on his phone.

“Hi.” I tell him and he looks up, nods, then looks back down at his phone. I try not to think about everything Raisa has told me about him. Those were just stories as far as I knew, but the way he nonchalantly lives his life makes me think he really doesn’t give a fuck about anything.

“So what happened to you?” she asks, crossing her legs and leaning against the opposite wall of the car on our side.

“I overheard my parents talking about someone dying.”

“Like a relative or something?”

“No, someone who worked for them got killed. But the weird part is that I think they’re trying to keep it secret or something.”

Out of the corner of my eye I see Matteo looking up at me.

“Do you think they did it?” Isabella asks, genuinely concerned for me.

“I don’t know. They’re just being secretive about it.”

“What does your father do?” Matteo asks me out of the blue.

I turn to look at him. He looks tired and I can see the circles under his eyes every time the car passes under a streetlight.

“He’s a businessman.” I answer, as vaguely as possible. One conversation with Raisa and he’d know all of our family history. For all I know, he does already. I can't imagine what the two of them could talk about, but it fascinates me to think about it.

“Were you scared when the police came?” I ask both of them.

“Not really, I mean, it’s not the first time police have broken off our parties in Italy.” Isabella answers.

“It was the first time they took me to the station and found drugs in my possession.” Matteo idly says, head tilted towards his phone but still looking at me.

“And what did they do to you?”

He shrugs, as if he were talking about a trip to the principal’s office. “Nothing.”

I look at him, trying to read his face, but it looks like he’s trying to do the same thing to me. It's like he’s waiting for a reaction or wondering what I'm going to say next.

“Hm.” I say, leaning back into my seat and taking out my phone. “It means you’re one of the lucky ones then.”