C16 I Have My Own Mind

"So, what are you thinking, Kendrick?" His father's growling voice welcomed him home. Leo needed to go somewhere, and he was not comfortable sleeping in his apartment, so he decided just to go home. He just looked at him and then continued walking as he headed to his room. He was not in the mood to have an endless discussion with his father. His head hurts because of being drunk, and that's because of how they had treated him in front of Alice. Yes, she was just his pretend girlfriend, but still, he was a human with a heart.

He couldn't help but wonder why his dad until now was treating him like a child, like he didn't know how to decide on what he should be doing in his life. "Kendrick Villarama, I am talking to you. How disrespectful are you?" His father shouted again, which made him stop. What should he be doing? "Go there, and let's talk," he continued as he pointed to the study room.

"What now, Dad?" He couldn't help but ask. He was already tired, and all he wanted to do was to lie his back down on his bed. "What, what now?" His father threw his question back to him. "Are you not thinking? Go inside the study room, and there we will talk," he added and started walking towards the study room without waiting for him to respond.

Kendrick took a deep breath. Every action he made, he didn't know, but it was always wrong for his family, especially for his father. It seemed that even him being born in this world was not right at all. He hated the day that he was born. "Follow your father in the study room, Kendrick. Don't let him get mad at you," his grandmother said from his behind. He nodded at her without saying a word. If there was someone who could understand him in this family, it was his grandma. And, he didn't have the heart to break her heart, so he was following everything that she was saying except for her last request to him.

He had been honest to her that he couldn't do everything that she could ask, but if he could, then he would do it right away but not her last request, which he knew was also from his father. His father couldn't just say a word to him because he knew that no conversation had been okay between the two of them so he couldn't really find a reason why they even needed to go in the study room. After everything that he said to him in front of his cousins and his Aunt, he would like them to talk in private? What was he really up to? Why was his own father making everything difficult for him? Sometimes, he couldn't help but wonder if he was really his child because of the treatment that he was getting from him. He would favour other children over him. And, he hated him for being like that.

He knocked twice at the study room door, and then he pushed it opened. His father was sitting on his desk while waiting for him. Nelson Villarama. He was no doubt his father because he looked like his young version, but he couldn't help but wonder why he was like that towards him. He was even nicer to his Aunt Carmela's children. So, what's wrong with him? What was wrong with his father?

"Look, I am sorry for what I said last night," his father uttered, which made him lift his head and looked at him. He couldn't determine if he was sincere in what he was saying or not. What did he eat this morning, and this man full of pride was apologizing to him all of a sudden? He was not used to hearing those kinds of words from his father. Nelson Villarama was a strong and mighty person, and he never bowed to anyone. He considered himself one of those few people who made it to the top ten for the most rich young man in the world. He was just looking at him as he couldn't find the words to say towards him. It was as if he had swallowed his tongue because of surprise. He never thought that Nelson Villarama would be apologizing to him.

"I know that you have your own mind and you feel like you know what you are doing, but—"

"That's enough, Dad. You began by humbly apologizing but in the end, we will be having the same conversation we are always having. Haven't you gotten tired of it? We are just going in circles," Kendrick cut off his father in the middle of his words. His eyebrows were drawn together while he was looking at him intently. Every now and then he was trying to convince himself not to get mad at him and try to understand him, but recently, his father was doing so much for him to get angry at him.

Nelson Villarama shook his head. He looked like he was disappointed because of how he acted and of how he interrupted him while he was speaking. "Kendrick, for how many times that I told you that I am your father and I will always be. I am not telling you these things because I just like to scold you or even shame you, but these are all for you, son. I just don't want you to regret anything in your life," he said while looking intently at him.

He scoffed. "Dad, I have my own mind. I am of legal age. Why can't you trust me? Why can't you let me spread my wings and do the things that I wanted in life instead of you dictating to me what I should be doing? I am not a puppet or your shadow, Dad. I want to have a life of my own. What is so hard to understand with that?”