C1 Introduction

Dressed to Impress

Why do we go weak in the knees for a man in uniform? What is it about a simple outfit that can transform an ordinary guy into an object of worship? Regardless of whether he’s a police officer, a military man, a firefighter, or one of those guys in sexy brown pants who delivers nice packages (both in a box and in his pants!)—there’s something about the uniform makes us stop and stare.

Some say a well-fitting uniform can make a hot guy even hotter, while others posit that it’s the uniform itself that’s sexy. But why? Is it the fact that many uniforms—especially those representing an accomplished state, such as a military ranking or a level of law enforcement—are worn with pride, making the man stand straighter, more erect?

Does a uniform indicate strength? Does it turn a guy into a badass? Is a uniform indicative of job security? Or is it the simple fact that everyone likes a guy who can dress well? Of course, a sharp-dressed man can be a very subjective thing—I once met an interesting fellow who claimed to be turned on by anything in a Star Trek costume—so thankfully there are many types of uniforms for us to drool over.

Whatever your pleasure, I am pleased to present a collection of steamy tales featuring strapping studs decked out in one specialty outfit or another. Some of the stories are romantic in nature—a quest for beer leads to a fling with a soldier on leave which then helps bring an unlikely couple together in Kit Christopher’s “Alameda Naval Air Station, October 16, 1969”; and a Royal Canadian Mounted Police officer searches for a wanted man but ends up wanting one in Landon Dixon’s “Bear with Me”—while others deal with the uniform as an obsession. This is most glaringly true for young Corin, whose hero, a fireman, is also the object of his desire in Gregory L. Norris’s “Burn”; and the relentless Will, who will do just about anything to get his handsome mailman naked in Rob Rosen’s “Out of the Blue.”

There’s no better proof that the law of attraction works than when one sexy uniformed stud finds himself drawn to another. Such is the case in Russell Clark’s “Uniformly Excited,” a story about a marine going at it with a hotel bellman; and Brett Lockhard’s “Officer, Interrupted,” in which the fatigues of a navy SEAL just home from Afghanistan attract a baseball player fresh—or rather, hot and sweaty—from an exhilarating home game.

And believe it or not, a uniform can even lead to enlightenment. This is the theme in Joe Thompson’s “What the Doctor Ordered,” whose brazen young protagonist finds himself on different sides of an outfit fetish in back-to-back hookups; and in Mike Hicks’s “Special Delivery,” where we learn that even when a UPS guy makes an error, it can be a win-win for all parties.

But things are not always what they seem. Sometimes when the uniform comes off, the persona comes off as well: A writer who wants to blow the lid off a scout groups’ antigay policy ends up blowing something else in Roger Willoughby’s “Kamikaze Journo Seeks Troop Leader,” while a mistreated chauffeur in 1960s’ New Orleans attempts to establish some boundaries in David Aprys’s “ChrisCross,” and a traveler who hates airport security is surprised to find something he does like in Natty Soltesz’s “T&SA.”

Perhaps this collection’s most bizarre uniform worship will be found in Mike Connor’s “Into the Orange” or T. Hitman’s “My Night of Wild Sex with Wilton Parmenter.”

Regardless of the outfit’s specifics, one thing is clear: A uniform transforms an everyday guy into a modern-day Superman, one who—ironically—we can’t wait to get naked. Because the only thing sexier than a man in uniform is a man out of uniform.

Happy reading.

Winston Gieseke

Berlin