C1 Chapter 1:

Every new day was the beginning of each new nightmare.I had no escape but myself, My family would never understand what I go through.Imagine having a twin who looks nothing like you, on the other hand parents who didn't care about/ for you.

To feel alone, yet someone is always there to kick me, when I'm down.No one really knew me and what I could live with everyday.

After being tormented since I was eleven, which started off as petty, then grew into abuse, something in me and him changed.

And before I knew it, seven years later,I began to feel drawn to my bully. I was falling for the bad boy who broke me.

Wellups!! Here is my first chapter! This book is kinda serious, which is weird cause I'm the least serious person in the world! So you know this is going to be dramatic, hectic and comedy!! Because well it's me, so obviously you all are going to laugh while reading!! Argh!!! I'm getting really excited about writing this! Oh and did you see the cover for this story!? Props to me! Hope you enjoy my story!!!

Here we go....

When I finally escaped the hell hole freshman year,I never expected to go back. I mean, the bullying only got worse. Sure I was a bit chubby,I admit it. The thing was I didn't care how chubby I was,I didn't care that no boy liked me that way,I didn't care that all the clothes that were too cute to pass,wouldn't fit me. I just didn't care.None of that mattered to me. I am a nerd, but a better word would be antisocial so basically, lets just say I'm antisocial.

And that's only because after Adrian turned the whole world against me,I turned against the whole world. I started shoving my head in books,I started doing so much extra credit, that they literally couldn't teach me anymore.Sure I was able to go into college classes, but that would just make the bullying become worse with time. So I just declined, sitting in class, learning things I've gone over a million times in my head. It at least gave me time to think for my self. But now, sitting in this car, about to drive into my old drive way,I didn't want to go back to this life. The life where I took everything that was thrown at me without hesitation, because that wasn't the real me. I want to show people the me that I've hid all these years, the one that I've been trying to show since I was eleven.

So like I had said before, the bullying got worse, much, much worse. I don't know what it was that took a huge turn for me, it could have been the girl I met in a therapy meeting. She said that it helped her to feel better, so I tried it. I don't know if better was the right words I would use,I would tell you this, it hurt like hell. Although it still gave me results. Instead of feeling embarrassment and sadness,I felt control. Self inflicted pain. I hate taking orders from other people, they weren't allowed to hurt me unless I said it was okay. So instead of letting Adrian decide he gets to hurt me,I decided I would. I gave up on that now though. We left and I didn't talk to anyone, other than my sister Hannah. She was my twin, definitely not identical, seeing as how Hannah looked like a goddess. How she ended up with skinny body, perfectly tanned skin, exactly the right height for any guy, beach blonde hair, blue eyes and a smile that people can't say no to. I had to deal with my annoying drab plain hair, obese body fat that took a year and a half to loose, obvious blue eyes, pale skin, long legs that you'd be surprised a fat girl would have, and a laugh that could creep out Beetle juice.

My sister had found the cuts on my arm, and her being the caring sister she is,totally spilled it to mom and dad. I wouldn't tell them why or who was pushing myself to do it, because it's not Adrian's fault,it's mine. I could have avoided all of this but I just wanted to try it because it worked for other people. I told my parents that it was someone in this town and they immediately packed our bags and we moved. We moved about 8 hours away, far enough to get away from whatever it was that was bothering me, they had said. I didn't care were we where,I still didn't talk to anyone. I asked Hannah for help right away when we moved. She was my personal trainer and dietitian. I have her to thank for all the weight I have lost,exactly 120 pounds. Yeah,I said I was fat, now I weigh a healthy amount.

I could now fit in all those pretty clothes from fashion magazines. You know the ones that look a billion times better on the models than on you. If I couldn't wear it,I could dream about it, right? Well even though I could fit in cute clothes,I preferred cardigans, skinny jeans and my combat boots.Thats exactly what my closet consists of. I have like twenty different cardigans, fifteen pairs of skinny jeans and six pairs of combat boots. Yeah,I wasn't exactly making a glorious fashion statement. Sure I had shorts, and tank tops, heels and dresses even, but I wear that around the comfort of my own room. Like no one sees me in anything else ever…. Not even Hannah and she knows everything and sees everything about me. It's actually quite creepy when you think about it. Oh and when I say everything I mean I told her about Adrian, but I can't even show her what I would look like in a dress. Confidence, we will get there someday.

Hannah was the popular,gorgeous girl that everybody knew and loved. I was Hailey ,her clumsy twin sister who wouldn't so much as look at you when you talked to her. Plus I was a mess. I'm gonna have to face it,I'm a mess!! I talked to my sister at school, and the teachers and occasionally the partners I was assigned to be with for school, but anyone else was completely of no use for me to waste my voice on. Is that mean? Well then you can add mean to the list of reasons why I avoid people all the time. Well what more is there to say?!

My life isn't special.