C2 The Breakup

I kept tossing in bed, I couldn't sleep that night, I kept a brave face on for my friend because I didn't want to bother her, but the reality was my heart was breaking, I kept replaying the scene at the party in my head. Austin and Camille kissing, getting hot and heavy in the pool. He told me he doesn't want PDA anymore when we got here. Is this why he has been avoiding me? Could I have done something to him and this was his payback? But I couldn't think of anything. I am starting to have a headache with all this thinking and I have a test by ten in the morning. I should rest and read because when Austin and I settle this thing the last thing I want to worry about is my grade.

"Are you reading Psycho-biological Basis of Behaviour? You should have woken me up, you know I don't understand the course that well." Ari said, walking to the kitchen to make herself a cup of coffee.

"Good morning to you too, you don't understand the course because the professor is an old lady whom you don't have a crush on and we both know you are the better student here and you will pass even without you reading. I don't know how you got so lucky."

"Genetics honey, my parents are both brilliant doctors, remember." Ari's parents are both doctors and they wanted her to be one too but studying psychology is Ari's way of telling her parents Fuck you."

My parents on the other hand are also doing very well for themselves, my dad owns a construction company, and my mum is a stay-at-home mother that enjoys doing charity when she is less busy, which is always these days. It's hard to keep up with her.

We stopped talking for a while and there was tension in the room. I know she doesn't want to be the first person to bring up last night's event and I appreciate it but her silence is getting to me.

"Ari you know I can hear your thoughts from here right?" I finally said, breaking the silence.

"Has he called you to explain himself like you said he would?" She asked, stroking the cat napping on her laps.

"No he hasn't but I can't think of that right now I need to read for this test." I said getting up, "you should be getting dressed too." It is about a ten-minute walk from our house to school and Ari always takes so much time getting ready.

"It is almost thirty minutes since we finished our test and we are hanging out in this new cafe on campus solely because Ari has a crush on the barrister. I wonder when she will finally choose from one of the many guys she likes and have a permanent thing. I was playing Candy Crush on my phone while Ari was bothering the poor guy. I looked up from my phone when I saw Austin slide into the seat in front of me. He looked as handsome as ever and smelled like wild rose mixed with something I couldn't decipher but it was my favorite scent, the smell of my favorite person.

"Hey Beverly, we need to talk about last night."

"Yes y'all need to talk and I can't wait to hear what stupid reason you have for kissing another girl and an enemy at that," Ari said out of nowhere.

"Ari, please he is here to talk, let me hear him out, and can you excuse us?" I said to her, giving her my I don't have time for this look. I watched her as she stormed out of the cafe.

"Wow, I don't know how you can stay with her, that girl is crazy."

"I believe you didn't come here to tell me how crazy my friend is and how do you know I was here?"

"Don't worry about how I found you. I know you chose this college because you wanted to be with me, your ability to care about everyone around you is one of the reasons why I fell in love with you, but I feel like you're doing too much, you are not giving me the space I need."

I was stunned, I didn't know he felt that way but we don't even hang out that much, he is studying Political Science and I'm a psychology major. We ran in different circles. I can't believe I am clingy, when did I become that girl.

"Are you saying I'm clingy? I asked with a trembling voice. "If you needed space you could have talked to me about it and it's not like I follow you around like a puppy on campus. I have my friends and class to keep me busy."

"Coming from a girl that picked her college because her boyfriend chose the same school I believe you have your answer. Beverly, I can't do this anymore, I'm young and I've only been with one girl before now, I want to explore and see other girls. I am sorry."

"No, you're not, you are not sorry. I can't believe you have slept with other girls already, you're an animal and I hate you. I don't want to see you ever again, not here, not back home in Vermont." I said trying to hold back the tears pooling at the corner of my eyes.

Standing up, "fine by me." I wished I am more like Ari right there so I could slap him. Austin is a bastard and more. He helped me fill out my college application when I told him I wanted to go to Connecticut too. How can a person change this much in the space of two months or was I too naive and have ignored the signs?

Ari came back in and hugged me, I finally let the tears flow, while hugging my best friend, at least I have my friend, and I am in the comfort of her embrace.

"He doesn't deserve your tears, and if it makes you feel better I kicked him in the balls outside, and the way he stumbled it must hurt a lot. Let's get you out of here." She released me from her embrace and I stifled my tears.

This kind of betrayal hurts, I trusted him, he was my only love, and to think he broke up with me just because he wants to be with other girls is just cruel. Quietly I followed Ari out of the cafe knowing some eyes followed me and heard my conversation with Austin but I didn't care, my heart feels too tight and it hurts Austin might as well stab it with a knife because that is how the pain felt like.