C10 Coping

Emma's POV

I never thought I could feel this much pain and survive. My whole body was trembling, and my soul was in pieces. There was a massive hole in my heart, and I didn't think I would ever be able to fix it.

My mate didn't want me.

I wasn't good enough.

My brother thought that I was weak.

My mate rejected me. He would have a new Luna, and I would have to look at them daily.

I didn't know how I got home. I didn't remember the path. Pain clouded my vision.

I left Logan and Andrew in the forest, and I just started running away.

I couldn't go back to the cave. I didn't want them to find it. It would mean that I wouldn't be safe there anymore.

We always used masking spray before coming into the cave. But Andrew and Logan came close to finding it. I guess because of the mate bond, Logan could smell me better.

I started walking to my room. I shut the door and locked it. I didn't want to see my brother. I didn't want to talk to him. I wanted to be alone.

I was lying on my bed and staring at the ceiling. I just wished I could feel numb. Not happy. I didn't think I would ever be happy again. The best I could have hoped for was numbness. Maybe I would be able to achieve that. Maybe the pain would burn through my body tonight, and in the morning, there would be nothing left but numbness. It would be like I had drunk poison. It would burn, destroy, and leave.

I heard my brother opening the back door and running upstairs. He tried to open my bedroom door.

"Emma?" he called me. "Emma, open the door, please."

I stayed silent. I didn't want to talk to him.

"Emma, please," he said, "Let me explain."

There was nothing to explain. I was a weak, small she-wolf who could never be good enough to be a Luna. Or Logan's mate.

Andrew tried to talk to me a few more times, but eventually he gave up when I refused to answer.

I heard him sigh and walk away.

I continued to stare at the ceiling. What a way to end a birthday. My day started full of excitement, love, and new beginnings, ending in pain and misery. I never thought it would happen like this.

I stayed up all night staring at the ceiling and wishing the pain would disappear. It sort of worked. By the time I was supposed to get up and go get breakfast, the pain was better and bearable. Maybe I could tell that a small part of me was numb. That was a start.

I heard my brother wake up. He walked downstairs to the kitchen and started making breakfast. Half an hour later, I heard Sienna coming. A little while after, Logan arrived as well.

It was tradition for them. They always met at our home, had breakfast, and then they went and did their Alpha and Beta duties. Sienna just went around being a bitch to everybody. But soon, she would have Luna's duties.

I looked at my watch and saw I had to be at the training ground in an hour. I decided to get ready and get there early. I couldn't stand being in the same place as them.

I got up and hopped into the shower. I quickly got dressed and tied my hair in a ponytail. I looked in the mirror, and my lack of sleep was clearly visible on my face. I sighed and unlocked my bedroom door.

I decided to leave through the back door so I didn't have to see anybody.

But my brother heard me.

"Emma?" he called me and came running from the kitchen.

I stared at him blankly.

"Where are you going?" he asked me.

"Training grounds," I uttered quietly.

"It is early," he said, "and Jacob is not here yet."

There was a loud growl in the kitchen. Logan.

I ignored it and put my focus back on my brother. "I want to get there early today."

"Oh. Okay," my brother said nervously, "but you didn't eat anything."

"I am not hungry," I said and walked through the door.

I closed it before he could say anything.

I walked over to the training grounds, and I saw that Jake was already there.

He saw me and gave me a confused look.

"Emma? What are you doing here? I was just about to come and get you," he told me.

Before I could say anything, he noticed how tired I looked.

"Emma?" he asked, worried. "What happened?"

"I am fine," I said quietly. "I couldn't sleep."

"Why beautiful?" he asked and wrapped me in his arms.

Goddess, why couldn't he be my mate?

"I found my mate," I whispered in his arms.

I felt him tense, and he pulled away from me to look me in the eyes. He let his hands be on my shoulders, holding me tightly.

"Who is it?" he asked me. "And why are you so sad?"

I couldn't answer him. Those words didn't want to leave my mouth. I looked down at my feet.

"Did he…," he started talking, but stopped himself.

I looked back up at him and nodded.

His eyes widened, "Oh, my Goddess. I am so sorry, beautiful. You don't deserve that. Nobody deserves that."

I smiled slightly and sighed, "Well, I guess it had to happen like that."

"Who is he?" he asked me.

"Not now, Jake," I said. "We will talk after training."

He nodded and wrapped me in a hug again. He kissed my forehead and walked over to his training ground.

My whole training session sucked. I was so tired and distracted that I got a nice ass whopping. By the end, I was covered in bruises and cuts.

Amy walked over to me with a frown on her face. "Emmy, you sucked today. What happened? Why were you so distracted?"

"I will tell you at the diner, Amy," I replied. "I need to go home and take a hot shower."

"Okay," she said, eyeing me up and down. "Are you sure you are okay?"

I nodded and walked away.

I just hoped that my brother wasn't home. I didn't want him to see me like this. It would only add to his belief that I was weak.

I was lucky. He was out. But a monster was waiting for me at home. Sienna.

She was leaning on the kitchen counter when I walked in. She eyed me up and down and smiled wickedly.

"Well, if it isn't the little rejected mate," she said, smirking. "You know, I always wanted to see the face of a little bitch whose Luna title I would be taking away, but the fact that it is you only makes it better."

I rolled my eyes and started walking upstairs. She ran after me and grabbed my hand, turning me around.

"Listen here, you little bitch," she spat in my face. "I am your Luna, and you will not roll your eyes at me."

"My Luna is Gloria. You are just a terrible replacement," I spat back.

She slapped me hard, and I fell on the floor. I should have seen that coming.

She stepped on my arm with her heel. It hurt like hell, but I didn't want to give her the pleasure of screaming. I looked up at her with a murderous look on my face.

"I can't wait for Logan to mark me as his. I will kill you and make it look like you ran away to be a rogue," she said quietly and walked away.

I slowly got up and walked upstairs to my room.

My life would be a living hell until Sienna finally ended me. I was sure she would make sure to torture and torment me whenever she had a chance.

Even though Logan rejected me, she still saw me as a treat.