C2 BE MY GIRLFRIEND

"Miss Rhea, everything is now ready."

"Okay. Let's start," I said to my personal assistant.

We walked go to our seats and wait the event to start. There were many famous designers and even famous actors, actresses and models to witness this event.

"Miss Rhea, are you sure it's okay with you to sit next to him?" she whispered.

I turned my vision to left side only to see his eyes directed on mine. I could see mixed emotions through his iris. I turned back my gaze in front with stoic face.

"I won't mind," I just said.

The event finally started. It is a fashion show event and the designs were mine. This is what I dreamt about and I couldn't believe it is happening now.

But I also couldn't believe that he's here, watching my milestone. Ayoko sanang madistract at i-enjoy nalang ang nangyayari, pero 'di ko magawa.

Until the event finally ended. Kanina ko pa gustong umalis sa kinauupuan ko. Hindi ako komportable na katabi siya, hindi ako komportable na nandito siya.

I'd to deliver my speech and thank everyone who came to support this event. It was successful and many designers were willing to buy my design and even want a collaboration. Marami ding gustong magpadesign sa 'kin matapos makita ang aking talento. Eto na talaga, nangyayari na.

After my speech, I had to entertain everyone and greeted them. It was overwhelming to hear them praising my work. Grabe!

I walked go to the table to grab wine, thirst because I needed to socialize. A friend of mine once said that I needed to know how to socialize if I want to grab big opportunities.

"Rhe rhe."

Gosh, 'wag ngayon! 'Di pa 'ko handang makipag-usap!

"Rhe, can we talk?" he asked when I pretended not hearing his call.

I sighed and faced him. "Don't call me that. It's Miss Valmonte for you," I said.

Nakakainis kapag tinatawag niya ko ng gano'n. Bumabalik lahat sa isip ko at hindi ko 'yon gusto.

"Oh, I'm sorry," his eyes became weaker. Then, he holds to me a bouquet of flowers.

"Just want to congratulate you. You achieved your dreams. I'm so proud of you," he smiled.

"Thank you. A simple 'congratulations' will do, 'di na kailangan ng ganito," I said while grabbing the flowers from him.

"No, you deserve those flowers. When I saw them outside of a flower shop, I remembered you," he said, still smiling.

"Yeah? Dahil ba mukha akong paso?" I retorted.

His smile slowly faded when I said that. His eyes saying those words he couldn't say.

"Sorry pero marami pa 'kong gagawin dito. Excuse me," I said and turned my back against to him.

He then grabbed me by my wrist. "Wait lang. Pwede bang mag-meet tayo one of these days, please?"

Binawi ko 'yung kamay ko at mataman siyang tiningnan. Para saan pa?

"No. So please let me leave?" I said. This line was his last words when we last talk.

"Gusto kong magpaliwanag sa 'yo, Miss Valmonte. Please hear me. Kahit ilang oras lang," he begged.

I bit my lower lip, perplexed. I wanna let him to explain so I'll have answer to my 'whys', or not, because it's not necessary now.

Ginala ko ang mga mata ko at nakitang may ilan na ang nakatingin sa 'min. Argh! Kahit kailan agaw atensyon talaga 'to.

"Fine. Find ways to contact me. And I'll see kung kailan ako pwede," I just said.

For once and for all, gusto ko na talagang uminom at iwala ang mga mata ng mga taong nakakakita sa 'min.

***

"Good morning Rhea," Gisselle greeted me when she came to my office.

She then recited my schedule. After the event aired to a TV news, mas dumami pa 'yung offer na tinatanggap ko.

"And.. " she was hesitant to what she wants to tell.

"Go on, Gisselle."

"He contacted our business number. Ayoko sanang ipaalam sa 'yo kasi wala namang kinalaman sa business," she finally said.

Gisselle was like my best friend. We met back in high school and became classmates when she transferred as second year student in our university and then, we became friends.

"It's okay. I told him na humanap ng paraan para ma-contact ako. He wants to explain his side of the story," I said. "Tell him this afternoon, I'll meet him to a coffee shop. Same place, same time."

***

When I entered inside of Cindy's coffee shop, I quickly saw him. I walked towards him and sat in front of him.

"I'll get us order, what do you want?"

"Just Americano."

"Okay, saglit lang," he said and he even had the guts to smile, huh?

I wandered my eyes around the whole place. This place witnessed how devastated I was after he'd turn his back against me.

Then the memories with him started to run on mind.

It was a rainy day at school, my shoes got dirt and my hair was kinda wet. Kapag nakita na naman ako ng mga bully, pagtatawanan na naman nila 'ko dahil ganito itsura ko.

Yeah, I got bully. Since grades school to college sila sila nalang din ang nambubully sa 'kin. Hindi ko alam kung anong problema nila sa 'kin, 'di ko naman sila ina-ano.

"'Yun oh! Guys nandito na si Rhe Rhe!" the browned hair said.

Maya-maya lumapit na silang apat at hinarangan ako.

"Panget ka na nga mas lalo ka pang pumanget ngayon, Rhe!" the tall and pale one said.

"'Di ka siguro mahal ng nanay mo, 'di ka inaalagaan, e," the masculine and tanned one said.

Then, they laughed. 'Di ko talaga alam kung sino 'di inaalagaan ng nanay dito e. Ako ba o sila, parang mga bata na walang magawa sa buhay.

"Tigilan niyo na 'ko. Papasok na 'ko sa klase ko," I said, it was barely audible to hear.

"Let her pass this time, pumasok na din tayo," the adonis of the group said.

Naghati sila sa dalawa, binibigyan ako ng daan. So dumaan ako at umaasang wala na silang gagawin o sasabihin sa 'kin. Pero ano pa nga bang aasahan sa mga 'to. 'Yung akala kong mabait, pinatid ako.

"Oooohhh!" they laughed and started to walk away.

***

The next day, I'd to study in the library because of our exam. What's to expect? I'd no friends. Kung meron mang nakikipag-kaibigan, for sure, they're just tripping. So, pagbabasa at pag-aaral sa library ang pampatay oras ko.

Biglang nagbulungan ang mga tao sa library kaya napatunghay ako mula sa librong binabasa ko.

"A-anong ginagawa mo dito?"

"Ano bang ginagawa sa library?"

"Uh, I mean bakit dito sa harapan ko?"

"Don't tell me binili mo 'tong space na 'to?" he asked, the side of his lips rose up.

Binalik ko nalang 'yung tingin sa libro ko. Alam kong may pakay 'to. At kung ano man 'yon, wala rin akong ideya.

"Okay, hindi ko na patatagalin 'to. Sasabihin ko na kung anong pakay ko sa 'yo," he said. I knew it!

"Be my girlfriend."

"W-what?"

"Don't be so happy, it's just a dare."

I blinked twice before processing what he just said. Just what's with these people!

"A-ayoko."

"I know. Ayoko rin naman."

"'Wag niyo na 'kong isali sa mga laro n'yo. G-gusto ko ng matahimik ang buhay ko at makapag-tapos ng maayos, kaya k-kung pwede lang tigilan niyo na 'ko," I said. Finally, nagkaroon na 'ko ng lakas-loob para masabi ang mga 'yon.

"Just for 5 months. You would benefit from it. How? We will no longer bully you after this."

I looked at his eyes. Shocked and at the same time couldn't believe to what he said.

Ilang araw kong pinag-isipan ang sinabi ng adonis ng grupo na 'yon. Sure, I wanted to deal with it because honestly, I want a peaceful college life. But every time na iniisip ko 'yung mga lokong 'yon parang ang hirap nilang paniwalaan na tutupad sila sa usapan.

I'd a little crush on him. Do'n sa adonis ng grupo. His name is John Vincent Pascual, JV for short. Noong grades school kami tahimik lang 'yan na nakamasid sa mga kaibigan niya habang binubully ako. I thought he was an exemption. He's smart, handsome and talented. Hindi niya 'ko binubully noon pero hindi niya rin ako pinagtatanggol. But that was okay, at least tatlong bugok lang 'yung epal sa buhay ko.

Nitong college lang niya 'ko binully. I guess, nagbabago talaga ang tao. Pero ewan ko ba, may crush pa rin ako sa kanya kahit nagaya na siya dun sa tatlong shokoy.

The monday came, it was our first day of second semester. Akala ko hindi nila 'ko makikita nung dumaan ako kasi may kausap silang mga babae. But then, 'pag talagang trip ka, trip ka.

"Valmonte! Ano deal?"

"Bakit ba pinapatagal mo pa, 'di ka naman maganda."

"Oo nga, Rhe. Ano deal na 'yan!"

I looked to JV, he was quiet and his eyes were looking away.

"Uh, a-ano bang mapapala niyo sa 'kin kung p-pumayag ako?

Kailangan kong malaman kung para saan ba 'tong laro nila.

"Para magka-girlfriend na 'tong kaibigan namin at para pag-tripan na din!"

The three shokoys laughed.

"Basta, tumupad kayo sa usapan. Kailangan ko ng assurance na tutupad kayo."

"Don't worry about that, I will punch their faces if they don't," JV said. The three shokoys were smiling.

"O-okay, pumapayag na 'ko."

That was it, the whole university learned about the weirdest relationship, according to them. JV Pascual, the living goddess. And me, the living ass. And it was the freaking decision I'd to make in my whole 19 years of existence. Parang mas lalo akong pinag-usapan ng dahil do'n. Argh!

Sinusundo at hinahatid ako ni JV araw-araw. Sabay kaming kumain kasama 'yung tatlong shokoy. Niregaluhan niya rin ako ng sketch book and stuffs for sketching. Madalas siyang magkwento 'pag may free time kami, at syempre napapa-kwento na rin ako para naman may ambag ako sa relasyon namin. Na-kwento ko sa kanya lahat, kung paano namatay ang nanay ko sa isang aksidente, kailan ko nakahiligan ang pag-sketch ng damit, at kahit 'yong maliliit na bagay dahil kinukulit niya ko na magkwento ng kahit ano tungkol sa 'kin. Kaya noong matapos 'yung limang buwan na usapan hindi ko alam kung paano aaminin na nahulog na 'ko sa kanya. I know, tanga ako. Kahit alam kong dare 'yon, hindi ko napigilan ang sarili kong mahulog.

"So this is our last day we have. I'd so much memories with you for just 5 months. Thank you for making worth my time," I said.

Because I was happy with him every time. Umaasa ako na sana 'wag matapos dito, na sana kahit paano naging masaya din siya kasama ako na maging dahilan niya para 'wag tapusin 'to.

We were in Cindy's coffee shop. It was our favorite coffee shop. We were always here just to chill and relax and spend our time to talk about life. But now, we're talking about our end. It was just sad, we were once happy in this place and ending everything now. Same time, same place.

"Yeah," he just said.

Kanina pa siya tahimik simula nung dumating siya dito na para bang may malalim na iniisip. Akala ko nga 'di siya makakapunta kasi mas nauna akong dumating.

"Uhm, JV m-may gusto sana akong sabihin sa 'yo."

Here we go kailangan ko ng aminin sa kanya. Ayokong matapos 'to, sa kanya ko lang naramdaman 'yung ganitong pakiramdam. Hindi ko alam ang tawag dito, pero sa lahat ng nabasa kong libro about romance, they called it love.

"JV, g-gusto kit-"

"Rhe, hindi kita gusto," he cut me off.

Feeling ko nanghina ako nang sabihin niya 'yon. Hindi ko pa man nasasabi ang gusto kong sabihin sa kanya pero pinutol niya na agad lahat ng pag-asa ko.

"I-I know, kasi hindi ako maganda, right? K-kung gusto mo magpapaganda ako p-para k-kahit paano-"

"I just don't like you, Rhe. So, kung ano man 'yang nararamdaman mo para sa 'kin itigil mo na 'yan."

Damn, that was a big slap on my face. I bit my lower lip, looked away and convinced myself not to cry. I felt every fiber of my being wanted to break down.

"Sige, may gagawin pa 'ko."

"JV saglit. Do you really not liked me once? K-kahit ba sandali hindi mo naramdaman, kahit ilang segundo ba.. h-hindi mo 'ko nagustuhan?"

"No. So please, let me leave."

After I got her Americano and Cappuccino for me, I walked towards her. She was like reminiscing our last conversation in this place. When I sat in front of her, she got back her senses.

"Uhm, bilisan natin kasi may pupuntahan pa 'ko," she said.

"Oh, okay. Uhm, remember our last talk? Same place and seats?"

"Sinong makakalimot do'n?" she said as she reached her drink.

"That was a lie."

"W-what?"

"I lied to you. I lied when I said I didn't like you."

Flabbergasted. Her face was like saying 'what the hell did you say?'.

"Gino gave another dare before our last talk. He dared me na kapag last day of '5 months-relationship-deal' natin, sabihin sa 'yo na hindi kita nagustuhan o gusto. At kung gagawin ko 'yon, hindi n'ya ipatatanggal 'yung scholarship mo. Remember na muntik ka ng mawalan ng scholarship because some girls hated you for being my girl?"

Yeah, dahil nalaman ng buong university ang relasyon namin maraming nainis sa kanya. To the point na pati scholarship ni Rhea nagawan nila ng paraan para ipatanggal.

"Yeah, pero that time wala akong pake sa scholarship ko dahil kaya ko namang pagtrabahuhan 'yung pambayad for tuition fee," she said.

"And that was the reason why I accepted Gino's dare. Ayokong mahirapan ka. Ayokong magkanda-pagod ka kung pwede ko namang gamitin ang connection ni Gino."

"W-wait, this is too much to process," she said then heaved a long sigh.

"So, bakit ngayon ka lang lumapit para sabihin 'yan? Nagkikita tayo sa school mula sa malayo pero bakit 'di ka lumapit para ipalawanag ang mga 'yan?"

"I thought after saying those to you, you'll hate me and curse me to my face kapag lumapit ako sa 'yo."

"You don't know a thing, Mr. Pascual. Hindi mo alam kung ano 'yung dinulot ng mga sinabi mo sa utak ko, sa pagkatao ko. Araw-araw iniisip ko, na kung sana naging maganda ako magugustuhan mo 'ko."

F uck man. Dahil 'to sa mga gago kong kaibigan. Hindi naman talaga siya panget, e. She was just quiet and weak para ipaglaban ang sarili. Maganda siya actually, kaya nga since grades school to college nagpapansin 'yung tatlo sa kanya. And to be honest, I had feelings for her since grades school. She's smart, quiet and talented. At dahil nahihiya akong sabihin 'yon sa kanya, palagi lang akong nakamasid at minsan tagapag-pigil sa mga kaibigan ko sa mga masama nilang balak sa kanya. Yeah, gago talaga 'yung tatlong ugok. At nang malaman ng mga kaibigan ko na may gusto ako sa kanya, pinagtripan nila 'ko. Sa 'ming apat, ako lang 'yung hindi nagkaroon ng relasyon, kaya 'yon. 'Di ko talaga alam kung bakit naging kaibigan ko 'yung mga 'yon, e.

"And now, you're saying na dahil sa dare na 'yon, a f ucking game, nagkaroon ako ng anxiety and body shaming? What the hell."

Hell, I felt guilty. Gusto kong tanggalin lahat ng sakit na naramdaman niya ng dahil sa 'kin. Gusto kong bumawi sa kanya. Kung noon wala akong nagawa para sa kanya, ngayon gusto kong iparamdam sa kanya araw-araw 'yung happiness na deserve niya.

"But thank you. Ngayon pakiramdam ko nakawala na 'ko mula sa nakaraan. Hindi ko na kailangang isipin kung bakit hindi ako magawang gustuhin ng isang tao noon. Kung anuman 'yung ginawa mo para sa 'kin noon, thank you. Thanks to Gino na rin," she then smiled at me.

"S-so, are we good now?"

"Yes," she reached her drink again and then stood up.

"Thank you, Mr Pascual. I need to go now. See you around," she said and smiled for the last time and leave the place.

Pero may hindi pa 'ko nasasabi. Gusto kong malaman kung meron pa ba 'kong pag-asa sa kanya. Kaya tumayo ako para sana sundan siya pero sana hindi ko nalang ginawa at nanatiling tulala sa iniinom ko.

I saw her through glass wall of the coffee shop, hugging a guy who seems waited her outside. They were smiling and talked a bit before going inside of the car. So, that's the story behind of her ring she's wearing. She's now engaged. I smiled to myself. F uck dares.