C15 Pablo

At lunchtime, I could have my meals with my prison colleagues, which was great shit, because the place was noisy and the men were always picking on each other. It was nothing like the warm comfort of the kitchen and the side conversation in which my co-workers kept, leaving me silent.

But I couldn't complain. I wasn't the only one to be forced into that. All I had to do was keep quiet and leave the chaos around me as if it were an unpleasant movie that was on my television.

By my side was Ramirez, eating as if he had just come out of a war. I couldn't be unfair to say that our food wasn't good. She was, but nothing compared to the preparation of a woman. I missed the strong spices and the love that my mother used to use for cooking.

Inside it was all dry and soggy. I did my best in the kitchen, as well as my co-workers, but nothing came out like in the outside world. The prison had its own rules even in food matters.

"Why aren't you eating? " Ramirez asked, stopping attacking his puree. "The way I'm hungry, I'll end up robbing your plate.”

I pushed my aluminum plate towards him, disinterested.

"Go ahead.”

"You look very strange," commented Alef, watching me with a frown. " Did you receive any unpleasant visits?”

There were no secrets in the penitentiary. At that time, two hours after my meeting with Joana Jones, I swore that everyone already knew that now I had a new lawyer who was very difficult not to look at each other more than once. Only, whether it was her influence, or the sudden lack of interest in gossip, no one really knew who had dedicated a few minutes of their day to visiting me. They knew, however, that the visit had taken place.

"I have a new lawyer," I said softly, because despite sitting next to my little circle of friends, the table was long enough for anyone to listen. "And she asked me some questions about my past and my history. I think it messed with my head, in a way I still don't understand.”

"A Lawyer? " questioned Júlio, leaving his aluminum fork hanging loosely over the plate almost untouched. "I didn't think a woman would be interested in taking over your case, PS.”

"And why not? " Afonso replied, in a partially indignant tone. "As far as I know, he didn't commit any crime against women.”

"If I had committed, I had been dead for a long time," said Ramirez, giving me a deadly look.

The man was a true defender of women, and I couldn't say he was at a different level. I've never treated any girl less than with chivalry. Even though I was shit, I didn't take my problems out on someone with a fragile body. Unfortunately, not all the men in that prison thought the same way.

Many were killed on their first night inside the prison, others managed to ally themselves with the worst types of gang leaders, so they ended up surviving. But still, the worst crimes committed against women were still punished with death. Abusers did not survive in prison; this was a rule from which none of them could escape.

"She was hired by my brother," I informed, totally ignoring the small discussion that followed at the table about men who were arrested for assaulting their wives.

"The brother who never even visited you? " Ramirez asked, shocked.

"As soon the person we all think is involved in your prison? " completed Alefe.

That story of thinking that Hazz would be involved in the complaint that put me behind bars was a passing and very insane thought. I thought about it only in the first three days of prison, then I got over it. Whether he's an asshole or not, Hazz wouldn't lose his own brother by sending him to hell. He was just too turned off to notice that I needed some family contact to endure those cruel days.

"Yes, soon he" I confirmed, giving a dull laugh. At that moment, Ramirez took advantage of my distraction to take the contents of my dish and devour it. I sighed when I watched Alefe. "And from what she told me, she seems to be someone who doesn't usually lose a case easily. She just needed me to tell her everything, so I would be free.

Alefe nodded, although the surprise still remained in his countenance.

"Are you told me?”

I denied it with my head.

"I can't risk it.”

"What's up, PS? " said Afonso, frowning his face. "Now that you have a chance to escape, do you prefer to keep the secrecy and let the door close again?”

"I don't want to be responsible for any more tragedy with my lawyers," I explained in a firm tone, but my colleagues did not seem convinced. "Listen, I don't have to prove that I'm innocent. That's my lawyer's job. If she's as good as she seems, she'll find out everything by herself. My confession is the last thing she needs to conclude the case.”

" But, being sure of her confession, she can choose a route to work," said Ramirez, with his mouth full. "I think this may have been the reason why all the lawyers abandoned your case, Pablo. You don't give confidence.”

"They are the ones who need to pass on confidence," I shrugged. "Anyhow, I don't want to throw information in the wind. I know how everything works in here. I won't talk until she gives me a real guarantee that I will be released. I'm not going to risk it.”